Saying No

In The art of saying "no" from  Blue Skunk Blog,  Doug Johnson shares ways to tell other no and not look like a curmudgeon.

My husband says that I never say no to anyone except him! Even though that is a slight exaggeration, he knows that I have a hard time telling people I won’t do something. In fact, a lot of people ask me to do things because they know that it is hard for me to do something. I’m not talking about salespeople who try to sell me something but rather people who know me and want me to do something for them.

When I was younger, I never told people I couldn’t or wouldn’t do something they needed me to do. Of course this ran me ragged and I never had much time for me.

Now that I’m older, I realize how precious time is and that I need to say no and be more selective about the things I am asked to do.

Here are some of the things I do:

I do not say yes right away and ask for time to think about it. Usually if I can get away from the moment, I will later realize that I don’t want to do it and it is easier to say no.

I sometimes blame my husband (and he has suggested that I do this if it makes saying no easier) and tell them that my husband does not want me to commit to anything else right now.

I thank them for asking me but regretfully say no. This usually makes me feel better about saying no.

I explain that I’m very busy right now and would not have the time to do the task as well as I would want to do it. If they say that it doesn’t matter, I explain that it would be fair to anyone because it would stress me out and also, others would be disappointed in me. I’m just not that kind of person.

Sometimes I’m just honest and say no, I don’t want to do it. I know these people just appreciate an honest answer with no excuses.

Do you have a special way to say no to people? Please share.