Optimist or Pessimist

In The downside of possibility from Seth Godin's Blog, Seth Godin states,

“Optimists are always a little disappointed.”

I think I'm part optimist and part pessimist. I tend to look at the bad side of things, so I won't be too disappointed. Sometimes my husband calls me a naysayer, but I don't mean to be this way. Other times,  people look at me and think I'm an optimist and I'm always looking at the good side of things.

Sometimes I think you need to have a balance between both sides. I don't think you should be overly optimistic or overly pessimistic. Sometimes you need to be a realist. I think the most important thing is to accept whatever happens when it happens and be prepared to deal with it when it does.

I think it's okay to be an optimist because you are expecting things to be better and you strive to work harder. Looking forward and expecting the best is a good thing. Of course, it is natural to be disappointed if things don't work out the way you expect. The important thing is seeing what needs to be done in order to be successful and not giving up.

Being an optimist helps you have the right mental attitude for facing obstacles. It helps to keep you moving forward. This mental attitude will keep you from giving up and help you continue trying. That is the key to being successful. It is important not to give up and when things don't go the way you want, look at what needs to be changed in order for you to succeed. This might mean you need to ask for help or change your procedures or even change the tools you are using. Taking the time to reassess the situation is a good thing to do.

How do you help your students be more optimistic rather than pessimistic? Please share. 

Photo by Kyle Glenn on Unsplash

Coming In Second

In 2nd Place from Sioux's Page, Sioux Roslawski asks,

“How do you handle not making #1? Does missing top spot get you discouraged?

Or, does it make you dig your heels in and try even harder the next time?”

I really don’t mind coming in second place because I hate when the limelight is on me which would happen if I came in first.

I think I’ve always felt uncomfortable if someone calls me the best or if I win a competition. I have never liked to compete in competitive sports. I hated when I was young and had to be in a state accordion competition. I hated the pressure and expectations. I hate the worry about failure or embarrassing myself and my family. When I ran for public office, I hated those feelings and it was just as bad when I won the first term and lost the second term.

I once had a friend that told me that I like to show off and love to be the center of attention. That has stuck with me for many years and it really hurt my feelings. Now I feel very uncomfortable when I hear those words in the back of my head whenever I am doing something in front of people. I don’t want to be a showoff and now I constantly worry about what people may be thinking about me. These anxious moments will drive me crazy.

On the other hand, I resent these feelings and try to push myself through them. Why shouldn’t I be proud of my accomplishments? Why shouldn’t I try to be the best in what I want to compete at? Why is wanting to be the best wrong? Why do I let this one person’s words control my behavior?

When I accomplish something good, I have to remind myself that it is okay to feel proud of what I’ve done. It is okay to show off my accomplishments as long as it doesn’t put anyone else down. My husband is always telling me that it is okay to “toot my own horn” because others might now know about something if I don’t share it. He is my biggest cheerleader.

I wonder how many of my students feel the same way. How many of my students have let one person’s negative words shape their future? Why are negative words so much stronger than positive words?

How can I help my students get past these same feelings? The only way I know how to is by sharing my experience with them. Talking about them and discussing these feelings help bring them out in the open. Maybe by sharing and talking about them, the negative words will lose some of their power. Then we can work on replacing the negative statements with more positive statements.

How do you help students who come in second place? How do you help them overcome negative thoughts that shape their behavior? Please share.

Photo by Boris Stefanik on Unsplash

Fighting Negativity

In Stay Positive: 7 Ways to Cancel the Noise of Negativity from Cool Cat Teacher Blog, Victoria A Davis, Cool Cat Teacher, asks,

“Think of those people or places where negativity clouds the space like fog on a warm spring day. What can you do to cancel out the noise?”

Hearing others express negativity can be annoying, especially if it is something that happens on a regular basis.  If it is a one-time thing where strangers are involved, I tend to just remove myself from the area if at all possible. If I can’t remove myself, I usually suffer though it because it isn’t worth the grief and heartache to have a confrontation. If I’m alone, I will put some earbuds in and try to distract my brain from hearing the negativity around me.

There are several things I do to fight negativity when it surrounds me at the workplace.

I try not to hang around places that breed negativity such as a teacher’s lounge when it starts.

I try not to hang around people who are constantly negative. I like to surround myself with positive people.  Sometimes these positive people may have a negative attitude but it usually isn’t a common practice.

If someone approaches me with a negative opinion and they want me to agree with it, I usually try to stay neutral. I don’t want to feed a negative attitude with a negative attitude. I may try to say that I haven’t made up my mind yet or I’m still thinking about it.

If I strongly disagree with someone with a negative opinion, I may voice my own opinion in hopes to change their opinion.

I may try to bring humor into the situation to diffuse the negativity.

What do you do when you encounter negativity? Please share.